Dear Landlord...

Extracts from real letters sent to landlords, complaining about problems....

The toilet is blocked and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared.
I want some repairs done to my stove as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.
This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the man next door.
I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is running away from the wall.
I request your permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.
Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.
Will you please send someone to mend our cracked sidewalk. Yesterday my wife tripped on it and is now pregnant.
Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny color and not fit to drink.
Would you please send a man to repair my downspout. I am an old page pensioner and need it straight away.
When the workmen were here they put their tools in my wife's new drawers and made a mess. Please send men with clean tools to finish the job and keep my wife happy.